Beware of bullies…………………….

With the new school year beginning, we see subtle changes of a new season.  One thing that doesn’t seem to change is bullying, and regardless of the time of year it is, there have always been bullies.

In school, our kids and grandkids have more opportunities for interaction with actual human beings, through academics/sports or through those online presences. There are new challenges for parents to monitor what is happening in the real world or the cyber one.  Teaching kids to have respect for all seems to be the   basic tenet of life but unfortunately, some children do not learn that, and as adults, they do not display it.  

Bullying is aggressive behavior, it is intentional, and may be physical, verbal and/or visual. Bullies seek power and control and it is clearly discriminatory- treating another hostilely, without regard for their rights or their value.  Bullies are often hot-tempered, belligerent, negative, domineering and have poor impulse control. They are intolerant of differences and have a feeling of superiority.  They often do not know how to deal with pressure, have too much responsibility or are envious of another.  

One out of five children report being bullied, with bullying affecting 28 per cent of the student population.  Among high school students, the cyber bullying percentage increases, and the saddest part of all, is that 50% of the kids do not even know the identity of the online perpetrator. 

As bullies grow up, they continue a persistent pattern of mistreatment and can be found in all walks of life- businesses, organizations, government, neighborhoods, even families.  Bullies never seem to learn that “you get more with honey than you do with vinegar.” 

The consequences of bullying in children are dire.  It creates low self-esteem, lack of confidence, depression, health problems, and may lead to poor academic achievement, drug and alcohol abuse and at the very worst, loss of interest in living- suicide.  

So, as concerned adults, what can we do to protect them and stop this?  

~Open communication: we must take the time to talk with our kids, stay involved in their lives and have them realize that we are always available to help.  Now, there are so many ways to even keep in touch long distance-text, email, Facetime, phone call.  Notice any warning signs- any changes, unexplained injuries, avoidance.  Listen and don’t pre-judge.  “I would rather be a little nobody than to be an evil somebody.” ~Abraham Lincoln.  

~ Don’t ignore it: If they feel threatened in any way, they may not know how to express their humiliation and embarrassment.  Bullies need to be held accountable-“ You can’t be against bullying without actually doing something about it.” ~ Randi  Weingarten     Bullies try to make one feel alone and powerless.  We need to keep connected to show support. 

~ When you see something, say something.  For every child, for every human being, doing nothing, or saying nothing is allowing and encouraging bad behavior to continue.  Bullies like an audience and we need to step up and explain that this behavior will not be tolerated.  There is strength in numbers! 

We want all our kids to have a stress-free childhood and enjoy their lives- in school and out.  We want them to grow into responsible, respectful adults- we want to be proud of them.  Regardless of their ages, younger or older, as parents, we always need to be aware and ready- and continuously remind them-

“ If people are trying to bring you down, it only means you are above.” ~ tumbler.com

For more information: stopbullying.gov
 

  

Susan King
Secretary and Sergeant-at Arms/ Parliamentarian, Ibis Cove

  

 

“I’m so glad that I live in a world where there are Octobers.”
~ L.M. Montgomery, Anne of Green Gables

What does autumn remind you of?  Do you come from a place where there were dancing red,yellow,orange leaves- crisp cool air- hand-picked apples- brightly lit jack o’lanterns?  Did you ever fall into a pile of crunchy leaves or smell the smoke of a distant fiery heap?  Autumn in Naples is a bit different but still memorable: a subtle change to our weather, pumpkin picking, farmer’s markets, fall festivals and our beaches and pools are always welcoming! 

Embrace the season……………………..
~Naples Artcrafters Fine Art and Craft Show     Cambier Park     October 1
Rocktoberfest  10k & 5K    North Collier Reginal Park     October 6   12 noon
Brew-Ha-Ha  Craft Beer Festival          Mercato           October 19        12 noon
Thursdays on Third    Third Street South    October 24    6-9pm
Spooktacular Treats and Eats    Salvation Army, Naples     October 26   3-6 pm
Stone Crab Festival   Tin City Shops   October 25-27

APPLES!        APPLES!!      APPLES!!!!
Autumn skies and apple pies
Keep calm and eat an apple
     Don’t upset the apple cart
A is for Apple
American as apple pie
       An apple a day keeps the doctor away
Comparing apples to oranges
              One rotten apple spoils the whole bunch
The apple of my eye
An apple for the teacher
The apple never falls far from the tree
“The Big Apple”

“ In November, the smell of food is different.  It is an orange smell.  A squash and pumpkin smell.  It tastes like cinnamon and fill a house in the morning, can pull everyone from bed in a fog.  Food is better in November than any other time of year.” ~ Cynthia Rylant

Try this autumn recipe- from the “Art of Cooking and Serving,” c. 1930.  
                      (My grandmother’s delicious dish! – S.King)

 DUTCH APPLE CAKE 
          ¼ cup Crisco                              3 tspns. Baking powder
¾ cup sugar                                      ½ tspn. Salt
2 eggs                                              ¾ cup milk
2 ¼ cups flour                                   1 tspn. Vanilla 
Sliced apples                                     9” by 13” pan
Sprinkle mix: butter, sugar cinnamon

Cream Crisco, sugar, and eggs together.  Mix and sift flour, baking powder and salt and add alternately with the milk to the first mixture.  Add vanilla and beat thoroughly.  Pour into a greased pan, having batter 1 inch deep in pan.  Arrange thinly sliced apples in rows on top of batter.  Sprinkle with sugar, cinnamon and dot with bits of butter.  Bake in moderate oven, 350 degrees, 45 minutes or until the apples are tender.  

“I am grateful for what I have.  My thanksgiving is perpetual.”
   ~Henry David Thoreau

Christmas Day is Wednesday, December 25, 2019.
Hanukkah is December 22-30, 2019
New Year’s Day, Wednesday, January 1, 2020

“ May the holiday season fill your home with joy, your heart with love, and your life with laughter.” 
                                How to have a less stressful holiday…………………

~Have a plan and a budget, especially for gifts-  “ Something they want, something they need, something to wear, something to read.”  

     “Don’t forget: people need really very little in order to be in the happy life.”
                                                                                             ~Marcus Aurelius

~Make a list and stick to it. Decorating, cooking, gatherings, family traditions. Who can help???  Who can bring a favorite dish??  

~Choose a one stop shopping location, in store or online.  And you won’t have to keep finding parking places!  You can even make a LIST on store sites, think about it and then simply “CLICK!” 

~ Remember the forgetables. Don’t forget tape, wrap, ribbon, batteries, cards, stamps, tags, WINE.   And if you have to mail it, get it out early or let it be shipped.  

~ Stop SHOPPING!   When you’re done, you’re done!   Crank up the holiday music, dance around, and ENJOY YOUR HOLIDAY, too.!!!!!

Live every moment of “20”.. and feel blessed to have the opportunity to see another day in paradise.  HAPPY NEW YEAR!   
IBIS COVE-  20 IN 20!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
 

WAS HELD ON WEDNEDAY, SEPTEMBER 25 2019. THOSE IN ATTENDANCE WERE:
Susan King, Nancy Ferrari, Roseanne Liguori, Susan Morton and Lori Schena.

THE FIRST ITEM TO BE DISCUSSED WAS CHANGING THE HOURS OF WATER AEROBICS ON MONDAY, WEDNESDAY AND FRIDAY. TO 10:-11:00

We first discussed the pool and surrounding area.  The pavers on the sidewalk leading to the parking lot are lifting and need to be fixed and sealed. 

The hot tub temperature in the pool is well below 104.
Umbrellas are left open.  This is hurricane season and they  should be closed down after use..
Food is being eaten at tables that say NO FOOD OR DRINK.
 RADIO IS TURNED ON AND LEFT BLASTING ALL NIGHT LONG.
THE TABLES NEED TO BE CLEANED AND ARE A MESS
The girls who worked in the office took care of this..


CHILDRENS PLAYGROUND TOP OF  A STUMP OF AN OLD TREE.  THERE IS A BROKEN CHAIR SITTING ON TOP OF THE STUMP.
DANGEROUS.

LIBRARY IS IN EXCELLENT CONDITION.  WE DO NEED CHILDRENS BOOKS AND WILL PUT OUT A NOTICE  FOR CONTRIBUTIONS

 LADIES ROOM      PAPER TOWEL DISPENSER DOES NOT WORK AND WAS REPORTED 4 MONTHS AGO.
MENS ROOM—DISGUSTING.

FITNESS CENTER.  ALL IS WELL….LOADED WITH COBB WEBS

KITCHEN COFFEE  MACHINE DOES NOT  WORK ANYMORE.  IT WAS NOT SUPPOSE TO BE DISCON

NECTED AND IT WAS,  WE HAVE TRIED IT OVER AND OVER AGAIN—NOTHING. IS THIS LEASED OR RENTED?

REFRIG.  CLEANED OUT AS WELL AS FREEZER – NOW NEEDS TO BE CLEANED OUT.     THERE  IS A PIECE OF -FITTED RUBBER ON THE EXIT SIDE OF THEN POOL ON THE STAIRS.

THIS WAS SLICED (POSSIBLY BY A KNIFE)  AND NOW HAS BEEN RREPLACED
THE PAVERS FOR THE FLOWERS OUTSIDE OF CLUBHOUSE ARE AWFUL.  THEY NEED TO BE CLEANED, REPLACED  OR REDONE..
 

 

              I'm writing this message because I've lived here for almost 13 years now & I think we are a community divided...by age that is !! IC is NOT a retiring community nor is it a 55 & over community...we are a community of families of ALL AGES !!

              When I first moved in here, I was told that IC was NOT kid friendly ( my boys were 3 & 5 at the time...today my oldest just graduated from GCHS & my youngest will be a Sopohmore this August ).
               Two weeks after I moved in it was Halloween & there were a LOT of trick or treaters out here.  Were they all from IC, probably not, but there were trick or treaters of ALL ages, from baby carriages to grown adults... & hey, if the adult was willing to wear a costume then I was going to give them candy !!

               We are a community of pregnant " mommas ", which means there will be new borns arriving shortly here in IC, there are Elementary school age kids, Middle school age kids & we have HS age young adults. Then we have those that are out of school, our 55 & over & maybe even 90 & above !!

                Getting back to the " kids " & the reason for my message..kids will be kids, they will scream & yell & make lots of noise : in their home, on their lanai, out in front of our homes & even at the pool, etc.
                 So with young kids comes LOTS of noise. This generation of kids is our future...
                 They have pumped our gas & will continue to do so..

                 They have bagged our groceries & will continue to do so, & they will bring our groceries out to our cars ( & if we're lucky enough they will even return our carts ) !
                  They have fixed our computers & will continue to do so.. & not just our computers but our Ipads, TVs, phones & any other electronics that we need help with !
                   If your neighbor next to you has kids & they are making "noise ", smile, wave, grin & bare it or maybe even join in on the fun !

                   Kids screaming & yelling is healthy & it gives them a great set of lungs !!
                   So please, go introduce yourself. But do NOT, I repeat do NOT point a finger at your neighbor & tell them how loud their kids are because that is NOT going to work !! This could be your neighbor for the next 10 - 15 years or more here in IC & maybe someday they may be the one kid who you turn to for directions !
 
            Remember, YOU were once a kid to....

 

We ALL have one.

           When you are communicating with someone & you both have different opinions on the " topic / subject " you are talking about, you need to respect the other persons opinion. When our opinions differ, it means one of us if FOR the topic of conversation & the other is AGAINST it.  It doesn't mean one of us is right & the other is wrong. It just means we are NOT going to agree.

            At this time it is best to just change the subject.
            Politics-- now there's a hot button topic , talk about disagreeing !!

            When there is a disagreement, two people will probably never see eye to eye...this could be two best friends, husband & wife, brother & sister, etc..etc.. It's ok, it happens, it's a part of life !!
             Never walk away from a conversation angry...just agree to disagree !!

             Move on from the conversation & who knows, maybe talk about the weather.. after all if you're both standing almost in the same spot, you have to agree on the weather !!

               As the famous Sam Elliot once said:   It's ok for you to believe what you believe, It's not okay for you to demand others to believe the same way...

            Again,  respect the other persons opinion... courtesy goes a long way...

              
 

 

A message from your social club   

   On Saturday, August 17th, IC had their first Back 2 School get together..
   There was pizza from Dominoes, chips, snacks, water bottles, juice boxes, crafts & lots of swimming for the kids !!
   The event was sponsored by Yanima Mazuera who is one of our community members & she is also in the Real Estate business -- Thanks Yanima !!

   The kids had fun, the mommas had fun ( the moms also started a group to get together )because this was the first day some of them met & they plan on having get togethers of their own for " play dates " & just some momma time !!
   The dads that came played a mean game of ping pong & I think they had just as much fun as the kids playing & the moms hanging out !

    Ladies luncheon was on August 15th & it was at Lulu Bs.

September :
    Ladies luncheon was on the 19th & it was at the Boathouse ( Thank you Sharon for putting it together ) !

Upcoming events :      October
    Thursday October 17th, will be our ladies luncheon at Coconut Jacks for noon-- please contact Joan at :  845-598-5105 to RSVP for the luncheon !!

    Saturday, October 26th, IC will have their first " Trunk-or-Treat ".. In case some of you are NOT familiar with a Trunk-or-Treat, it pretty much is what it sounds like..the kids will be getting treats from the trunk of your vehicles !  Kid friendly decorations PLEASE !!

    We are in need of volunteers for this event & we hope to fill up both parking lots here at IC ! The Trunk-or-Treat will start at 6pm & end at 7pm. We are just doing the 1 hour for this event because following this, in the clubhouse will be our 3rd annual kids Halloween party which will start at 7 & end at 8. So reach out to me if you are able & willing to participate in the trunk or treat !!

     Parents ( aunts, Uncles, grandparents ), the halloween party ( costumes optional ) on the inside will also be a time for you to grab a bite to eat...  this will also be a get together for you as well.. we will be having pizza, water & chips for you adults & the cost will be $ 3.00 per adult..for the kiddos we will have munchkins, donuts, apple cider & water & the cost for the kiddos will be $ 2.00 per child. Please RSVP by October 23rd to myself  ( info on the bottom of the page ) or to Yanima at : 239-300-5416.. leave your name, how many adults & kids will be attending. We will also be having a cookie decorating table & a craft table for the kiddos !!

      Thursday October 31st is the traditional Trick or Treat for Halloween, which the time frame has always been 6p-8p.  So if you are coming home from errands or work at that time, please use extra caution.. thank you.

November :
    Saturday November 2nd will start our community breakfasts .. the time will be  9:30  & the cost is $2.00 pp.. please feel free to bring a dish to share..
    Note for the breakfasts : the breakfasts are always the first Saturday of the month & they are November - April.. we ask $2.00 pp for the breakfasts & you dont always have to bring anything, only if you would like to.
    Sunday November 3rd, don't forget to set your clocks BACK an hour before you go to bed !!
    Saturday the 16th BINGO will start up in the clubhouse at 7pm.
    Ladies luncheon will be on Thursday November 14th at noon...it's a mystery this month so stay tuned for the name of the resturant..
 
December :
    Saturday the 7th will be our community breakfast at 9:30 in the clubhouse.. .after the breakfast,  the clubhouse will be decorated for the Holiday & our Christmas tree will be put up & will also need decorating . So PLEASE hang around to help out with the decorating ( that is if you can anyway ) !!        
     Saturday the 14th is our annual Holiday party to start at 6pm.

The meal will be catered by Friscos & the meal is as follows :
Carving staton :  london Broil
 Protein choice :  oak fired chicken picatta
Starch :                 red bliss potatoes  
Vegetable :       green bean almadine
Salad :                classic toss salad
Rolls :                 french baguettes
                Entertainment will be :  Legends of Naples Entertainment      

If any of you recognize this name it's because they have played before at our Holiday parties.  As one of our community members told me, she got to dance with " ELVIS " !! Now that's a party !!

              The cost is $ 35.oo pp & you can RSVP for a ticket anytime now... we just ask that the tickets be picked up & paid for by Novenber 30th.. hope to see you there !     

      Ladies luncheon will be on Thursday, December 19th at  noon, will have more details soon..
      Saturday the 21st will be BINGO in the clubhouse at 7pm.
       Sometime this month, Yanima & I would like to have a kids Christmas movie night, with just popcorn & a drink..we're working on details.. the kiddos could come in their pajamas & bring a sleeping bag & have the snack during the movie & go home with a little goodie bag.. just a thought.. what do you all think ??
 
               Any questions, please feel free to reach out to me..
 Happy Fall Y'all
   
                 One last thing : Ibis Cove is coming into their 20th anniversary, & we are planning something a little bit earlier than our " birthday " date.. September 25th we turned 19 years old !!

                 Saturday, February 29th is Leap Year so we are going to do something on that day because we think that most of our community members will still be here..
                        Food Trucks anyone....              
 

Lori Schena
Social Committee Chairperson
Unanny@aol.com / 239-272-9776 (I can get back quicker to you with a text !!)

 

Hello everyone, we have a husband & wife here in IC who are looking for people to play Bridge.

They are looking to play any evening or an afternoon.  They actually use to play 6 nights a week !!
I'm sure we could try & get a game night going in the clubhouse!

If you, or someone you know that may be interested in playing Bridge, please reach out to John & Lu Rice @ 239-920-4806.
 
Thank you!